sammy_ianto (sammy_ianto) wrote in jackxianto,

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How can you do this to yourself Ianto? Chapter 12

Genre: Hurt/comfort, Angst
Rating: NC-17 can vary through out chapters
Status: Incomplete
Warnings: suicide attempt, self harm
Summary: Ianto's past is comeing back to haunt him
and jack doesnt no what todo
he is just there to comfort him

Ianto blinked his eyes slowly, he felt so ill, almost like he had been out on the drink for a week, He turned his head to look at his suroundings. White, Everything is two white, He tried to run his hand through his hair but he couldnt he was restrained, no NO "GET THEM OF ME!" He screamed, he thrashed in his bed trying to break the restraints, That was when Jack and Owen woke up, They had fallen asleep in the chairs beside Iantos bed, "calm down Ianto everythings ok, your in hospital its ok" Jack stood at Iantos head strokeing his hand Through his hair whispering reasuring words, Owen worked quickly to lossen the straps, makeing shore they wasnt to loose for him to break free, "calm down tea boy, calm down" Ianto looked around wildly, scared "Jack were am i, why am i restrained, i dont like to be restrained" Jack looked at him with sympathy " your in hospital love, do you remember why?"
Ianto went pale and still, "The bathroom" He whispered his eyes wide, he closed them tight persing his lips, "I-I'm sorry" he opened his eyes but didnt look at Jack or Owen he just stared up at the ceiling, Owen checked The welsh mans vital sighns, everything seemed clear, his blood preasure was a bit low but that was expected, Jack looked at Owen for reasurence "Dont worry about it sweet heart we still have a long way to go" A nurse opend the door to the room, "Ahh Mr Jones i see you have returned to the land of the living, How are we feeling" Ianto looked at the Nurse with disgust drawn all over his face "How do i feel, HOW do i feel, I feel like shit"he tried to sit up more to look at the nurse in the eye "I Have put my boyfriend through hell, So how do you think i feel, I have sufferd blood loss, I have had my stomach pumped, so you tell me NURSE" he spat her title "HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL" The nurse looked at him with sympathy in her eyes "I'm sorry Mr Jones i didnt think, its just routine" A small smile played on her lips.

Jack looked at his partner "Ianto she did'nt mean anything by it, She was just asking" he looked at the nurse with sympathy as she checked Ianto over and changed the dressing to his arm, "well everything seems to be in order here so i will leave you men alone to talk" she looked at Owen a message passing between them just by there eyes "please excuse me a moment" he looked at Jack and left,
Jack could hear Ianto mumbling "I'm sorry, I dont Know what came over me" His hands grasped at the side of the railing tightly his nuckles white his lips pursed tightly, Jack ran his hand through his lovers hair and kissed his forehead, "Dont worry about it love, we will be okay" He wanted to reasur himself as much as he wanted to reasur his partner, Jack placed his hand over Ianto's and sat down "I want to Know what has been going on Ianto" he looked at him pointedly his head tipped to one side observing the young mans Face, He was going to get it out of him, he wasnt going to let it slide this time, He needed to know, Ianto was keeping tight lipped, Jack reached out a hand to grasp Iantos chin and turn his head towards him "Ianto you can trust me, Please tell me, your scareing me"

"Dr Harper, i'm shore you are aware that Mr jones is in a very critical condition concerning his mental health, He is going to need regular appointments with the mental health team, His phyciatris Mick Thompson Has agreed to meet him later on this afternoon to talk through all the steps we are going to take insuring his safety" Owen nodded his head his chin resting in the palm of his hand his finger brushing over his bottem lip, "I see, when will i be able to take Ianto back into my full time care, this hospital will be doing no good for him, Can we set up everything back home" The nurse shook her head "I'm afraid not Dr Harper, we are going to need to keep him in with us for atleast another week for consistent therapy" Owen's face looked grim but he nodded his head "fair enough" he turned and walked back into his friends hospital room.

Ianto did'nt look at his lover as he spoke "my mothers been stalking me she's been sending vile messages and ringing me with threats, She wish's me dead" he closed his eyes tight and took a deep breath "I guess thats why my nightmares started again" he attempted to shrug his shoulders forgeting he was tied down "How long has this been going on Ianto?" Jack looked at him seriously hideing the dispointment that his lover never told him "about a month, Shes been following me around cardiff aswell, ive been watching her on the cctv" Jack shook his head "i wish you had told me, we could have put a stop to this sooner, maybe this wouldnt have happend, why did this happen?" he looked at ianto and squeezed his hand tightly "I killed my Tad" he said simply "was this in a nightmare?" Jack looked at him "no i really did, yes it came back in my nightmare, But i did i really did kill my tad, He was takeing me to the cinema, it had been snowing and the road was coverd in ice, we crashed, I was sixteen, I tried to take my life two days later, I took a kitchen knife and sliced my wrist, sadly Rhiannon found me"

The door opened back into Iantos room and Owen walked in, "Right, you're going to be in for atleast a week with consistent thereapy, Dr Mick Thompson should be along shortly to talk to you about whats going to happen, Then you should be back in my full time care, You will be seeing Dr Thompson Once a week, but he will talk to you about that later" Owen flopped down into his chair and rested his head in his hands "Tosh called me earlier and informed me that yolur mother has been following you, and stalking you via the phone network" Jack looked at him " we're talking about that now Owen" Owen looked up at him "so your talking now?" Ianto did'nt say anything he just looked up at the ceiling keeping a firm grip of Jack hand "go home Owen go and see Tosh and go and see what Gwen has been doing" Owen sighed "I cant, I cant leave you two, Not just yet its two soon" he rested his elbows on his knees "we will be ok Owen" Ianto whisperd looking at the exasperated doctor "really we will, Go and see Toshiko" he smiled faintly and looked back up at the ceiling. " Ok but i will be back later on for the appointment with Dr Thompson i will get them to call me when it is close to the time, Call me if there is any problems, Please" it was almost like a plea "we will, go on, go your exhausted" Jack smiled and turned back to Ianto.

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